Something happened during December that just caught up with me yesterday. It is like it just "sunk in" what happened that day.
It was a couple of days after Christmas. Callum had gone to stay with his mom for a couple of weeks before school was back in session and me and the boys were going to meet John for lunch. I had gotten a bracelet for Christmas that didn't fit well and I was going to return it and swap it out for something that did fit. While I was putting it into a bag to carry with me that day I noticed the necklace and earrings that John had picked up for me at the same store and decided to return it as well...because, well... it just really wasn't my "style". It wasn't anything I would have ever picked out for myself. I couldn't really see myself ever wearing it and so I thought the only thing to do was swap it for something I would like and wear. I grabbed it and sat it in my front seat and when we pulled up to the store I began putting it in the bag to carry inside with us. Without looking in the backseat, I told the boys to come on and lets hurry and get in and get out so we could meet daddy for lunch. They didn't move. I asked again. No words. No movement. I turned around and both of them were sitting there silent with tears rolling down their little faces. I asked what was wrong and the answer I got changed me...probably for life. Kobe said this" We don't want you to return that necklace and earrings because WE picked it out for you. I am sorry you don't like it. We got it because it has your favorite thing on it: Crosses." Then Samuel chimed in and said, "And Angel Wings!". You can imagine the imaginary punch I felt in my stomach and the gigantic knot I felt lump up in my throat. I had not stopped for one second to think about them being with John when they bought this gift. They all picked it out together and here I was basically saying to them that I don't like what they pick out for me. I immediately put that necklace on and I have worn it at least once a week since that day. I know that it cut my kids to the core that day. They taught me a lesson...it really is the thought that counts. My sweet boys probably picked up and looked at each piece of jewelry they could get their hands on that day...and all they saw were two things that mean a lot to me so they chose that one. From that day forward I have appreciated every single gift...even the rocks and flowers picked out of my yard. I wore that necklace today...and proudly I might add! I love how thoughtful my children are and that they know me so well. I am so thankful for these two boys that God has entrusted me to raise.