John, Sara Beth, Callum, Haley, Kobe, and Samuel

John, Sara Beth, Callum, Haley, Kobe, and Samuel

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

How can It Be?

When I had both of my little boys, I knew that I loved them both beyond words. I never dreamed that I could ever love someone so much, even before I had ever laid eyes upon them. I remember sitting in their nurseries with them, just holding them and loving them and kissing them ... and crying. I was crying tears of happiness. My love for both of these little boys was so intense that it brought me to tears at times. Even now, I can hear a song that I played as they were going to sleep or smell and certain smell and I get all teary-eyed all over again. I surely didn't believe that I would ever "love them both the very same". I had heard of parents talk about how you don't love one child greater, you love them the very same. I thought that there was just no way that could ever happen. But, it did. When I would ask how on Earth my heart could hold anymore love ( I felt as though it burst at the very seams with my love for Kobe) my friends would say, you heart can make room. But, I think I must have grown another heart. I am so proud of both of my sweet boys and I love them more than any words I could type. Today, Kobe brought home is 2nd grade Spring pictures. I cried when I looked at them. How can he be about to turn eight? Where did my time go? I want it back! ;) I used to ask "How could I love someone that much?" or "How will I know what to do?" But, there is just something about being a mother... it just comes naturally to most of us. I am sitting here reflecting on my day and the funny little things my babies have said to me today and even now, almost 8 (Kobe)and almost 3(Sam) years later I still sit and wonder... "How can it be? How could I love someone so much?"

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